Friday, June 28, 2013

Featuring 3 Bachelors


Juan Pablo. Don't know if its the accent or the fact that he is a former pro soccer player. Every week I just prepare myself to see him get kicked off, since his only face time is the date he goes on for an advertisement for the Lone Ranger where he and Des are just making out in a barn.
Oh wait, there's this scene too.

He seems to just mutter some Spanglish occasionally and Des swoons over him, I mean I would too.
The only thing better than his abs....

...is his application questionnaire.

"What does your ideal mate look like?" JP: Fit body, good sized breasts, nice smile.
Way to be straightforward Juan Pablo! P.S. Des only has the first of those qualities.

"What is your favorite book?" JP: Don't read (gosh, we have so much in common)

Unfortunately in episode 4 it came to my attention that Juan Pablo's accent may be thicker than his...well...see for yourself...
Maybe it's just because Ben is bulging out of his speedo, but poor Juan Pablo looks more like a female swimsuit model.


Chris. The definition of tall, dark and handsome. But the first episode I had no idea who Chris was besides the fact that I remembered he was wearing purple socks. All of a sudden my twitter feed blows up with JHS alum Chris #jhshoorah #saderrumble #omghewenttomyschool. Had to google this of course and I find out he played baseball at Jesuit then at University of Portland (hence the purple socks?) and then for the Chicago Cubs minor league.

Also casually does some modeling on the side.


Even went back to Jesuit and yup, right there class of 2004. (He sure has blossomed since senior year.)

He and Des seem to have a lot of chemistry and have gone on several one-on-one dates. I project him going far since his poetry skills make Des cry, tears of happiness, I think?


Drew. So Drew is a model on the side too. His go to pose is the "oh man my head is super itchy and I need some Head and Shoulders, maybe no one will notice my dandruff if I take off my shirt."  Nice body, but a baby face.


I always found Drew to be a bit too feminine for my tastes and when he gathered the guys in the bedroom and was like, "this is important, I need to tell you something", I swore he was gonna announce that he was pregnant. He is the biggest gossiper in the house and looks like he's gonna turn out to be a tattle tale too.
What were you thinking with this outfit Drew? As I recall, you are on the bachelorette, you are not THE bachelorette.

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